You’re Allowed to Want More for Yourself: Key Mindset Shifts for Recovery

By Matt Codde

If you’re on the journey of recovery from OCD, anxiety, or any ongoing struggle, you might have settled for one goal: just not suffering. But what if you’re allowed to want more for yourself? In this post, we’ll dive deep into this transformative mindset shift, inspired by my recent Restored Minds video and mindset training. You’ll discover why just aiming to “not suffer” is holding you back — and how raising the bar can unlock true growth, purpose, and joy.

Why “Not Suffering” Is a Low Bar

Most of us, whether we realize it or not, set the bar for recovery at the absence of pain. We say to ourselves, “If I can just get rid of this anxiety, I’ll be okay.” When symptoms spike, we go into crisis mode. As soon as they drop to a manageable level, we switch into maintenance, thinking, “I just need to keep it together.”

But think about it: the best-case scenario there is neutral. There’s no suffering, but there’s also no thriving. You aren’t living; you’re just surviving.

The Cost of Settling for Survival

When your only desire is to not suffer, you’re always looking for the fastest, easiest way to numb your pain. This leads to:

• Quick fixes and self-medication

• Binge-watching or endless distraction

• Workaholism, codependent relationships, or other addictive behaviors

Entire industries are built around helping you escape yourself. Why do millions of people binge TV, obsess over social media, or lose themselves in work? Because it’s easier than facing yourself—and it’s easier than aiming higher.

The Power of Raising Your Standards

True recovery begins when you decide that mere survival isn’t enough. There’s a massive difference between staying alive and fully living. Once you start asking, “How good could my life actually get?”, everything changes. New opportunities appear, stuck patterns begin to shift, and a life filled with purpose and joy becomes possible.

Ask Yourself:

• What am I accepting as the standard for my life right now?

• Do I believe I deserve more than just an absence of pain?

• What would it look like to bring more love, peace, courage, and passion into my days?

Living Beyond Fear and Maintenance

Real recovery is about becoming someone who lives—not just survives. It’s about breaking out of the fear loop, operating from trust, and taking ownership of your inner state. Imagine sitting on the beach, doing nothing, and actually enjoying simply being you—without the urge for distraction or escape.

That level of inner peace and contentment comes from doing the inner work. It starts with wanting that kind of life for yourself, believing you are worthy of good things, and challenging the belief that you must suffer to have a meaningful life.

Your Next Step

If you’re ready to break the cycle of just getting by, I encourage you to raise the bar you’ve set for yourself. Want more for yourself—and pursue it. There are paths out of survival mode and into a life that you actually want to live.